Film Cliches

• In war films the character with the most hopes and dreams always get killed.
• “Little Timmy” always gets killed.
• Steven Segal can’t act.
• You can hack into the CIA/FBI database by simply mashing the keyboard on your PC.
• The stupid/hysterical/screaming woman always manages to escape in horror movies.
• James Bond is always put in an easily escapable situation.
• The bad guy has to perform a long/boring monologue before he is killed by the hero.
• Power cuts happen at the most annoying times.
• Being chased by a killer, the victims will always hide in the darkest possible location.
• Asian men/women always know some form of martial art.
• When someone makes a phone call it is answered at the first ring.
• In war films the sergent always has to do something heroic and get killed/have his legs blown off in the process.
• A computer never has to boot-up, it is always on the right screen.
• When ringing a doorbell the person waits for 3 seconds before thinking something suspitious most be going on.
• The hero is always able to drive a car, ride a bike, fly a plane or helicoptor or sail a boat without any prior training.
• Guns never have to be reloaded.
• Incriminating files are easily found on any villains PC.
• There is always a full moon.
• Whenever the main character is feeling hard done by/depressed it will start to rain.
• When it is raining people shout at each other.
• When a guy asks a girl out he will only ever say “fancy going out for a meal sometime”. They will never discuss arrangements (time, place, date etc…).
• Lifts always break down.
• Aeroplanes never have enough fuel to get to the destination.
• Cars only break down at night, on dark empty roads when it is raining.
• In horror films one of the victims fancys himself a bit of a tough-guy, and so offers to create a distraction for the killer, in the hope that he will get sex from the blonde girl with big tits at a later point in the film. But inevitably he gets cut to pieces with a chainsaw.
• A six-shooter can carry up to 12 rounds.
• Vents are always just the right size to crawl through.
• The police chief always suspends his best detective – who will go on to solve the case regardless of this.

Jack Thompson goes mental… again

For those of you who don’t know who Jack Thompson is he is an “anti-video game’s attorney from the good old U.S of A.

Following the recent decission in America to give Manhunt 2 an “M” (mature) rating, Jack Thompson went mental again with a series of e-mails to Take Two Interactive. I have posted the emails below…

From: Jack Thompson

Sent: Monday, August 27, 2007 4:55 PM

Subject: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

Dear Mr. Zelnick and Mr. Feder:

Congratulations on receiving a “Mature” rating for Manhunt 2. You’ll live to regret it (trust me), so enjoy it while you can.

I want to bring to your attention the fact that at www.rockstargames.com anyone of any age can order Manhunt 2 and receive it, with no age verification whatsoever. Asking a 14-year-old if he’s 17 is not age verification, now is it?

You also know that the use of a bank card as an age verifier is a violation of all bank card agreements, right?

Govern yourselves accordingly, if you can.

Regards, Jack Thompson

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From: Gena Feist

To: Jack Thompson

Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 2:47 PM

Subject: FW: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

Mr. Thompson,Your statements regarding our practices are false, as you know or should have known.

The Take Two website verifies age in two ways. First, consumers who purchase M or RP rated games certify that they are at least 17 years of age. Numerous websites use the same method for verifying age in connection with sales of movies and games. Second, we verify age through the use of a credit card number in connection with a transaction. Such transaction based verification is acceptable to both credit card companies and the FTC (see, e.g. http://www.ftc.gov/bcp/conline/pubs/buspubs/coppa.shtm).

We demand that you cease making these false statements about our online sales practices. Your dissemination of knowingly false statements for the purpose of adversely affecting Take-Two’s business is actionable and we reserve all of our rights under the settlement agreement and state and federal law.

Not only are your statements clearly false, but they were made in an email publicly disseminated to both the FTC and the press. Please be assured that I am happy to answer any questions you have concerning our practices in a private communications. It is for this very reason that our settlement agreement designates a legal contact for you at Take Two.

If you continue to make false statements to an audience of press and public officials, however, we will have no choice but to take action against you.

Sincerely,
Gena

———————————–

From: Jack Thompson

To: Gena Feist (T2 NY)

Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 3:39 PM

Subject: Re: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

As you should be aware, credit cards cannot be used to verify the age of buyers. Kids have credit cards, and they use parents’ credit cards. You have then got to be kidding me.

Take-Two is welcome to use age verification software that is available for on-line alcohol, firearm and other purchases of adult material. Stop lying.

Thanks

Jack Thompson, Attorney

———————————–

From: “Gena Feist (T2 NY)”
To: “Jack Thompson”
Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 5:30 PM
Subject: RE: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

Jack, give it a break. I am happy to answer your questions and correct any misapprehensions that you have but I will not engage in this type of discussion with you. I am not a liar, I didn’t threaten you, and I wont get roped into this type of dialogue. Don’t bother writing back because I will not answer any further communications along these lines.

————————————

From: Jack Thompson
To: Gena Feist
Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 5:28 PM
Subject: Re: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

Surely you are not taking the position that I am not allowed to communicate with the government about Take-Two’s actions, are you? If you are, then please know that that position renders the agreement unenforceable as a matter of public policy, since the law is settled that no agreement that restricts a citizen’s petition rights to the government is enforceable.

Are you seriously suggesting that an agreement that does not restrict me in that fashion does restrict me? Becasue [sic] if you are, then I have a new civil rights claim agains [sic] Take-Two.

Jack Thompson

———————————–

From: Gena Feist
To: “Jack Thompson”
Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 5:20 PM
Subject: Re: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

Jack,

I appreciate that you directed this message to me alone. In regards to your comments below, I understand that you disagree with the use of a credit card transaction as age verification but it is accepted by the FTC and the retail industry as verification of age.

You are on notice that we use two industry and government accepted forms of age verification. Please do not repeat your false claims publicly or make claims that I/the company are lying about this matter.

We entered into the settlement agreement because we did not want to engage in unnecessary litigation with you, but I assure you that we will enforce the terms of the agreement if necessary and that any suit will include a claim for our legal fees under paragraph 11.

Sincerely,
Gena

———————————-

From: “Jack Thompson”
To: “Gena Feist (T2 NY)”
Sent: Tuesday, August 28, 2007 6:17 PM
Subject: Re: Letter to Take-Two’s Strauss Zelnick, Ben Feder Re Manhunt 2

What is wrong with you? You threaten me with enforcement of the agreement, and I ask you how I have violated it. Are you nuts?

Jack Thompson, Attorney

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SOURCES:GamePolitics.com
Destructoid.com